There you are, cruising along in your early 40s, things are looking pretty good.
You’re at the top of your career.
You’re getting a solid 8 hours of sleep a night.
You jump at the chance to go out to dinner at 9pm.
And then, something shifts. It’s subtle at first. Until one day you wake up – slowly, you seem to have hurt your back somehow while sleeping – and you are more barely surviving than young and thriving.
As someone who still believes that 1990 was twenty years ago, this transition was grueling. I felt like a stranger in my own body. I was restless. And slightly ragey.
Here are the 10 ways to know if you’ve become a “woman of a certain age”. Which is a polite way of saying: Girl, you old.
- Grandma hobbies. You become acutely aware of extracurriculars, with a sudden interested in mahjong, pickleball, or knitting.
- Book clubs. You want one, preferably with wine and no drama.
- 6pm is the new 8pm dinner reservation. Home in jammies by 9pm.
- Exercising the word “no”. You have never felt more librated saying no to people, to plans, to dumb ideas. (Without giving a reason!)
- Oh, the creams and ointments! Your social feed is one continuous ad for moisturizers for crow’s feet and crepey neck skin.
- You’re the protein police. You will never have enough. Ever.
- Wide awake at 3am. You used to be really good at sleeping but now it eludes you.
- Caring for kids AND parents.
- A squishy middle.
- You just want to retire to a beach house and read, drink wine, and eat good food. (This one may be just me)
How am I the same person who used to START TO GET READY TO GO OUT at 9pm? Dress in my jeans and nice top while pre-gaming cheap beer. Forgo a coat in 27 degree weather. Stand in line to get in, only to stand in line at the bar. Humid air, sticky floors. And then a nebulous way to get home after you couldn’t flag a cab for 30 minutes at 2am. (Sometimes getting in cars with almost strangers to get home – wait, did we actually invent Uber before Uber did?)
Just writing that paragraph made me exhausted. Because girl, I AM old.
